Wednesday, May 30, 2012


Time is one of those things that just goes. But some memories stay with us. I remember coming home, I remember the blink on the answering machine, I remember my grandmother's voice. I had just seen them. We had just celebrated 50 years of their marriage. My grandfather had acted almost childlike. His shuffle at times was almost gone as he went from table to table greeting people and spending time with everyone. I mean everyone. I was amazed at the people that came to wish them blessings at being together for 50 years. He was so cute. My grandmother (much the mother) guiding him to this person and that person. It was so sweet. THAT was marriage. That is what I wanted. Pictures (that was just a given) and then clean-up. Back at their house, time to relax and for me, time to go get dirty. Yep, that was life at the lake. Regardless of age, that was life at the lake, let your hair down, go for a swim, boat ride, or a walk, but come back and you were dirty.
Here I was standing in my kitchen now listening to my grandmother talking about arrangements a week later. I must have listened to it twice maybe three times. I hit the floor. Tears pouring from my eyes, it couldn't be. It just couldn't. Before I knew it I was in the car driving to my mom's school looking for her, she was out on the playground and I rushed to her still in tears, begging her to tell me I heard the message wrong. Hoping it was a family friend, as awful as that would be, just as long as it wouldn't be MY grandpa. It was. Now what. Everything was going to change. Everything.
My grandma is still with us today, considering I was still in high school at the time, that says quite a lot. I know some people wondered if she would ever date or "move on". She once spoke on that. She was quite clear. I had my husband, for 50 wonderful years, why would I ever need anyone else. For 50 years I took care of and was taken care by the same person, why would I need anyone else? With that the answer was clear, regardless of living 5 more, 10 more, or 30 more years she was quite happy with the way her life is. A lesson I think we all should and could learn. I think too often we want more, what we have in life isn't good enough and we think that we could do better. Really? Do we not remember the years of what we have. I do! Not a single day goes by that I don't remember what I have. Not a day goes by I am not grateful for what life has given me. Do I need to think about life after... no... because like my grandmother I know that the life I have will sustain me and I will be super grateful for the years I had! Who could ever replace that?