Outshined? Or lighting it up?

When one kid excels at everything he or she touches what do you do? Me, personally, I let her! The youngest of 3 with an age gap of 5 and 8 years between her and her siblings, it wasn't that far fetched that she would do anything to "keep up". Personally, if she could have gone to high school with her older sister (8 years difference) just to spend time with her, I think she would have. Driven is a word that is thrown around a lot, determined gets added into the mix. I am not sure what exactly it is. She has those moments when she is totally satisfied being "the baby" of the family and wanting everyone to do for her. But then she has the more often than not, moments of sheer independence where she is the one capable of everything. If you want to come along for the ride, hurry up, train is leaving! I often sign forms for school not bothering to even ask anymore what they are for. Permission to volunteer for this, permission to participate in a leadership program, permission to attend college next year. Wait- what? Oh, yeah, she has already taken a college class or two so sure... 3 more next year, and maybe some over the summer. Who is this kid? I laugh when people caution me (which I get regularly)- make sure she doesn't get burned out. Um, I am not the one that signs her up for everything, I simply "approve" at the last minute. And I mean it! The form is always completely filled out and all I need to do is sign my name. She totally cracks me up. As for my other two. "Shining" to me has always been based on the light that is cast. I am sure you can all remember a cloudy day when you looked at the sky and the sun was poking through the clouds in streams of light. The areas that were in the sun had no idea about the areas covered in darkness. Each one of my kids offers unique perspectives to life. My oldest daughter is thoughtful and kind, tenderhearted, but cautions. She will laugh with you for hours, and hold you in your arms while you cry. She will drive out of her way to bring you a cold drink when you are really sick, and try to cheer you up, and then give you a hard time for getting sick in the first place. She will beg you to make her Dr.'s appointment for her and then tell you that you have to go to, because while she might be "an adult", there are still some things you "don't go alone". My son is complex to say the least. While men are supposed to be tough, he still is able to have compassion for those around him. He will look at a situation and see how he can help out. And while he will always argue with me about who loves who the most, the fact that he still wants me to know that he loves me, means the world. His place and path in this world is still being etched while he attends college, and I am enjoying watching him mature. My youngest daughter is our feisty one. And lately, most mentioned because she is the only one still attending high school. As mentioned before, she also is the most active. Not because the other two didn't that the opportunities, trust me, they were active in their own right and participated in everything they wanted to. But with her, she doesn't slow down, she doesn't have a stop button. I have gotten used to it. Do any of my kids outshine one of another? Not from where I am standing. From where I stand I have three great sunbeams shining and lighting up this earth each in their own unique way! There's no darkness in my life, only hope and excitement for the future!

Timeless Parenting

As each year passes, I find myself thinking back to the beginning. Rolling up to the field and trying to convince Elizabeth to stay in her stroller. That was a losing discussion from the beginning. She was off to the races right from the start. She always has been.

Now, over 10 seasons later, and many trips to the Doctor and ER with all of the kids, the one thing I do know is I wouldn't miss a single moment for anything!

I still get excited with each crack of the bat, every play, every awesome feet they accomplish. And while I am the first to help bring them back down to earth and remind them Nike isn't knocking at our door signing any deals (yet), I am definitely their biggest fan!

Being a parent is a timeless act.

I know how delighted I still get when something I do makes me swell with pride, and yet the first think I want to do is share it with my parents (who live several states away). My parents have never shied away from congratulations in fear of creating "big egos". They also weren't afraid of knocking us down a peg or two. We grew up, and they have never stopped being parents... Timeless!

Nothing felt better than hugging my daughter last night and telling her how proud I am of her. Not just because in 5 games in two days she had 2 in the park home runs, and 3 RBI's (yeah I can brag a little- it's my blog!) But I am proud of who she is, as a teammate, as a person, as my daughter. If they had lost every game, she would have gotten the same hug!

I hope years from know she'll look back on these years and not remember the trophies or awards she received (those are great too), but remember all the people that were around her. The friends that hugged her in the dugout (or pounded her head when she scored). The high-fives she got from coaches and their non-stop encouragement. The times her Dad coached her and worked long hours with her to help her grow or was her umpire and set her straight. The times she spent with other trainers working hard to get better. And lastly, the fence... when she looked through the fence what she always saw...
It's awesome being her mom. It's awesome being a mom to three great kids!!!

I love watching them grow and can't wait to see what life will continue to bring them.

New school year, new season

For those of you dedicated readers and life followers, we did move over the summer. Dogs, bearded dragons, iguanas, and a hamster.... Then the family!  Dedicated to providing the best educational opportunities for our kids possible, while we loved the size of our old house, the location didn't work. So with lots of detailed looking further North we moved, and we got a home that suits our needs (for now). The nice thing about the house is it once was (or at least was in the process of) an assisted living home (in a neighborhood). Weird, I know. It's a 4 bedroom home, two baths, and has all the bathroom safety features. In addition, it's got a complete fire suppression system. Even better, NO stairs! The steps outside were removed and smoothed to a ramp to the front door. Total score! So yes, total perfect "me" house... But enough about me! 

Erik remains at his school (always was the plan), and Elizabeth started middle school (yikes) this is were the comments flood in saying No way, you are way too young! Well thanks, but yes, middle school! And an awesome one at that! She is in a ton of advanced classes and just hit her stride right off the bat. The first grading period ended and they both did great. Erik's goal of improving his GPA this year is right on track. Lizzy's goal is already off to an excellent start! She can be very hard on her self. 

Softball season started and with our move came the need to move to a new league. Starting "over" can sometimes be hard, but then again this is Lizzy so although she isn't catching as much as she is used to (there's 4 catchers including her and she's the youngest) she has made a statement on the field. In true Lizzy fashion, she is proving herself and making a name, on the field... Right where it belongs! Always proud! But just like always she continues to be well rounded and her request for the tree climbing never stop. I hope her husband hunts, or something, cause otherwise he'll just have to put up with her need to have a tree house... Oh well!

Erik opted out of sports this fall, he wanted to focus on school, and is looking to start working again shortly. He amazes me with his maturity. I really have done well by him. He'd never admit it, but having Rich in his life really made all the difference in the world. He has been able to see that not all men run when times get tough, that's an important lesson! 

Amanda is doing great too! Working hard, with two jobs. She finally has a car, and is looking at options for school in the very near future. I laugh when people say, "well what does she want to do?" All I can think of is gee, I'm how old and what I "want" to do continues to evolve. I laugh, look at them and say, "grow up". When your that young, having just completed high school it's imbedded in you that you go to college. You go thousands of dollars in debt, at some point you figure it all out, and bam! You get a great job. Oops, except for one thing, that last part... Those great jobs are no longer a dime a dozen, and the specialized jobs often require specialized school, with specialized debt. So while kids are drinking college away, having parties, and figuring it out, sometimes it's better to work a little while you are figuring it out. Just a thought... From an MBA.... Who happens to be married to another MBA.... But then again... I could be wrong, and it could be just another rant of mine in a life of blogging. 

Weight

Weight of the world, Weight loss, weight gain, weighted grades, weighted down, weighted voting areas, weighted feelings...
Ever notice how much our lives revolve around one little word? WEIGHT! There are some that get up every morning and slip into anything that is in their closet. Then there is the rest of the world, that sit in front of there closest hoping that what they pick out won't embarrass them (or others). They hope they can get through the day without loosing a button, or busting a zipper. They pray at the end of the day the line on their stomach will go away by bedtime... Yep weight.  Living on a treadmill, elliptical, running, or a class for some is the rat race that in some cases feels like an endless race to the fridge more than it seems a smaller size.
Why do we do this? Cause for one we grew up in the "clean your plate clubs" only to learn that less was more! We have weighted ourselves down with all sorts of troubles and found ways around them time and time again... often cake...
I smile today as I know I will go home with my gym shoes on ready for the gym (taking off only Wednesdays and Thursdays- and some Tuesday's) and throw myself at some workout... why... well for a few reasons: Not because I have some complete low self esteem that says I am a cow and need to get right... NOPE! I know all things considered, I may not be perfect but my scale has yet to ask for relief. Not yet anyway! No, I'm heading to the gym because well I can! I can walk, skip, even jog a little. That is a HUGE feet all things considering. I want to continue being able to say that exact statement for years to come. I want to stand at everyone of my children's weddings, without help. The weight of the world... at times, weighted feelings, you better believe it! So as I gain a few pounds and loose a few, I know that every day I hit the gym and knock out a 5k on a treadmill, elliptical, or bike I didn't just win another day for me... I won it for them! Weight... a battle of words I think I'm winning...

That moment!

Ever have that moment when you want to say- "what is this really about?" Are YOUR feelings hurt, are YOU making a decision based on YOUR personal feelings or is this really "business". 
I'm always the first person to see my kids as "real". If they aren't good at something... I WILL TELL THEM. One of my kids is TONE DEF I mean it. To the point when we are in the car and music is going, this child is singing, I will ask, "who sings this song?"- "BLAH BLAH BLAH"- "Let them!" Yeah that's harsh- but it's honest!" I would NEVER let this child on American Idol! That would be cruel! Funny for that one episode, BUT CRUEL!
So when you tell me once, you want to do something for one reason and it involves something, then you tell me twice, yet you add more PERSONAL stuff each time... guess what... it's PERSONAL!
 I wonder why my kid would feel the way she does if personal feelings are being put on her! Ahh being a mom is difficult sometimes cause there's that moment when "mama tiger" sets in and you know you have to protect you little cub from getting hurt... There's lots of predators out there these days and some of them have quite a bite!

Rock it out !

They said what?

Yep! Smile like you mean it!

That's my girl!

Saturdays

I think I know why God rested on Sunday. SATURDAYS!!! We put so much into our Saturdays that it becomes a necessity to rest. Between school work, kids games, the things we can't say no to, and then the parties. I mean it becomes an issue of Sunday's become Saturday's we have to rest at some point. Two days get everything done that we can't do while we are working- it just isn't enough! Stay home... yeah- those who know me, know that ain't happening! I said AIN'T! I know women will look at this two ways- I have something against stay-at-home moms, or I don't think stay-at-home moms have lives... Let me dispel all of that now! I have "stayed at home" a few times. The first time was when Lizzy was born... we looked at the cost of child care (before and after school, and then adding full child care) and for the three kids, MOST of my check was going to pay for child care- what fun is that- three kids- roughly $375 a week! Ahh working 3 days a week out of 5 to pay for child care- seriously? The other two days paid what??? Then it was the time... So it was decided... I'd stay home... At 4 months old I needed OUT, the kids were driving me nuts... staying home drove me nuts. I loved spending time with them, but two of them were gone, the other one only talked (cried) at me when she wasn't happy. She wanted Dad anyway. For me- I wanted WORK. Cleaning the house is fun, but only for an hour... And it doesn't take 5 days to scrub a bathroom- that's an illness! Yeah, I needed work! SO at that point I started working 2 days, it worked great, Rich was off both of those days so no child care and he saw the whole "pick kids up" life... a day of Mr. Dad. They always behave for Dad- total crap! As we have gotten older, we have added to our lives with activities and I no longer work Saturdays, often. BUT I have substituted that schedule with a full time work schedule because to be honest, staying at home is NOT something this mom can do!  I have since "stayed home" a couple of times due to surgeries. Once for 6 weeks and once for 4 weeks. Both times I remembered immediately why I work  I hate staying home. I hate sitting around, I hate "finding things to do", and I hate spending my days around the house... it makes me find projects- which is always dangerous. To my stay at home moms- you gals are awesome! I would need lots of drugs- the depression I felt alone was enough to send me running back to work... for me I need work... So when the retirement years come, don't count on me to be sitting on my back patio. I will, but only to plan my busy day... I won't be home... nope- Rich will have to keep up... His dance card will be pretty full! Yep, just like Saturdays!